People who would have done a better job as guest judge on RuPaul's Drag Race than Geri Halliwell

- Any of the other Spice Girls
- Anyone who auditioned for the Spice Girls but didn't make it
- Anyone from All Saints
- Anyone from any other girl band ever
- Any Mitford sister
- Michael Portillo
- Elena Ferrante
- My five year old
- My two year old
- My dad
- Everybody else I know
- The character 'Bubble' from Absolutely Fabulous
- The Damn Daniel boys
- Any teenager
- My ex-colleague Ivan who worked in Business Development and enjoyed golf
- Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman
- Francis Ford Coppola
- Gemma Collins
- Mary Berry
- David Attenborough
- The ghost of Victoria Wood
- Anybody from Eastenders
- Anybody from Coronation Street
- Simon Cowell
- Simon Callow
- Simon Cowley, whom I have just looked up and is apparently a former Australian breaststroke swimmer
- Simone Culley, whom I have just looked up and is a head teacher in Detroit
- Cat Bin Lady
- That guy who got interviewed on the BBC that one time because they mistook him for their interviewee but he was actually just a driver who got shoved in front of the cameras before he could say who he was
- Susan Boyle
- Jeff Bridges
- Christopher Plummer
- Christopher Nolan
- Christopher Columbus, if you exhumed him right this minute and brought him back to life, bearing in mind that he wouldn't have heard of drag queens or TV or be able to speak English
- Anyone hanging out by the bins near the BBC
- David Furnish
- Daniel Craig
- Fearne Cotton
- Loretta Lynn
- Ralph Stanley
- Prince Philip
- Lionel Shriver
- Damon Albarn
- Jacob Tremblay
- E.L. James
- Flea
- President of the European Central Bank, Christine Lagarde
- Warren Beatty and Faye Dunaway
- Enya
- Mr T
- the little gay boy from that gif who looks really cheerful and then starts crying

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